Dear friend, I was never young. In years, I was young; I was born as a baby and progressed as one does. But I was never young in the sense of needs met, well-being protected, spirit cherished. What’s innocence? I definitely wasn’t guilty. But life didn’t unfold in a stepwise way. Choices were denied me,
I had a rage orgasm. It was surprising and almost scared me. Emotionally I’m going through a time of change. I’m making new choices including saying no to unbalanced, destructive relationships. Feels great to raise my standards and work on believing I deserve more. content warning: brief mention of sexual violation Family pain and trauma
Dear friend, I was thinking of that funny moment when I mentioned how in a previous community, my spouse had a reputation for undressing lickety split. Yes, at the moment of taking off clothes, he had it down to just a few seconds. You seemed surprised. You don’t know the whole story: a personal growth
“The other people I want to have sex with, it’s based on ignorance. I don’t know what I would find if I entered that territory. When I want to have sex with you, I know what I’m asking for. I want you–I love you.” I was talking to my spouse–we were in bed. “Wanting to
I was wondering, “Why does it feels so important, when I want to have sex with someone?” Feels vitally important, looming so huge in my internal landscape. My spouse is wonderful, and I have such good sex with him. Why risk so much with a new person, just for some thrills? Of course I want
“I like being nice to you, because then you keep wanting to have sex with me,” I said to my spouse, smiling. We were lying in bed mostly naked, sweetly cuddling at the end of the day. “And you’re always being nice to me, maybe because you like to have sex with me,” I added.
I was thinking about a friend I had long ago for a short time who wanted me to hold a key to his chastity belt. He was into these devices–the kind he had was plastic–that encase a dick, and are locked with a key. Why have I never talked about this chastity belt here on
This is plans for a banishment ritual. I loved some men, over the years. Devotion is a skill. I gave a lot, sometimes more than was best for me. Takes a while to learn the sweet spot. I have social differences, pertaining to autism. And I lacked healthy relationship role models as a kid and
This poem “craziness and consent” is mostly about disability and family pain. craziness and consent does consent count how crazy is too crazy when I’m in another mood altered state another world unshared reality my spouse tried to do it with me he takes no for an answer and never shamed me for anything
I had not been around Mexican guys drinking beer in a long time. That’s my family, the family I don’t see anymore, since my mom died. The Mexican guys drinking beer got my feelings swirled around. My instinct was to stay as close to my spouse as possible and pretend I didn’t understand what they