Categories
theory

sex with you

“The other people I want to have sex with, it’s based on ignorance.  I don’t know what I would find if I entered that territory.  When I want to have sex with you, I know what I’m asking for.  I want you–I love you.” I was talking to my spouse–we were in bed. “Wanting to

Continue Reading

Categories
smut

impact sounds

I recorded impact sounds and thought you might enjoy hearing them.  My spouse was hitting me on the ass, and I had emotional vocal responses. It’s been a stressful time.  I need pleasure, to relax and lose myself.  We hadn’t recorded anything in a year or so.  But we were house sitting and had the

Continue Reading

Categories
theory

what do you see

“What do you see?” I asked my spouse. We were both nakedly post-sex cuddling, and I’d asked my spouse to hold my legs up.  I have decades of problems with my lymph, so sometimes I ask the lymph to drain back toward my center where it can be processed and moved out. My spouse was

Continue Reading

Categories
theory

my ass

I took a better picture of my ass.  So large and fat–my hand is there too.  Usually I think my ass is flat, huge, maybe boring, and not that great.  But this pic is pretty. What do you like in a butt?  Do you like your own butt?  I like mine as a place to

Continue Reading

Categories
list poem unsent letter

safety into me

I wanted you to fuck the safety into me. I wanted your hands on me for a much longer time. I wanted to matter to your body. I wanted your unique intelligence up in my unique intelligence. I wanted to see how being close to you would change me. I wanted someone to collaborate with

Continue Reading

Categories
theory

what I realized

This is what I realized, asking my spouse to stuff my holes like the slut I am, every time I complained about emotional pain from loving a man who didn’t love me and choose me.  Mostly what I realized was something sad.  Pleasing others is how I get a sense of self-worth, and that was

Continue Reading

Categories
smut

direct request

“I need something different,” I told my spouse.  “Something very different.  So I’m going to write down my direct request.” He was in the mood to please me, even more than usual. “Ok, sounds great,” he said. a mood I had been experiencing intense grief.  I was in a mood, and I needed sexual pleasure

Continue Reading

Categories
theory

sub drop

If you’ve done bdsm with power play or pain play, you might be familiar with sub drop.  It’s important to know that you or the person you’re playing with might lose their shit in some hours. Oops, I forgot about it.  I experienced surprise sub drop the other day. massage A new friend–let’s call them

Continue Reading

Categories
theory

what sex is for

Hello, I’ve been thinking about what sex is for.  I was talking with my good friend–we were having a date, and I was happy she asked me some frank questions. daily “Do you and your spouse have sex every day?” she asked. Maybe I’ve mentioned it, or maybe she read about it in a blog

Continue Reading

Categories
theory

wake up

“I need to wake up,” my spouse said to me.  It was morning, and he was having a slow start. “Do you know anything in particular that might help you wake up?” I asked.  I was still in bed, writing.  “Like what if you could try yodeling.  Or you could masturbate.  Or you could plunge

Continue Reading