“Can I touch your balls, if I feel curious about them?” I asked my spouse. “Yes,” he said. I moved my hand to the sweet softness. “Can I touch your balls, if I feel affectionate toward them?” I asked. “Yes,” he said. I pet them with love. “Can I touch your balls, if I feel
You know that kid you met on the train and wanted to save? She was a runaway. The secret was she had escaped from sex work. You wanted to help her, but how? It was a bad situation. How much was she playing you? I was trying to understand the severity / immediacy of the
I love queer sex, and am not keen on straight sex. But maybe it’s a false distinction? That’s what I’m pondering today. I think of queer sex as dynamic–it changes mid-scene and over the years creative–we have to do different things than insert a tab into a slot showing up as my whole self transformative–it
He was wearing new pants, bright and colorful. He bought them at an Asian import store in town, mostly Nepali, on a whim. Usually my spouse wears dude clothes, dressed as a hiker, with REI style nylon outdoorsy cargo pants and cotton tee shirts, earth tones, with hiker-style shoes. So these bright rainbow cotton hippie
When you have a crush on someone, what makes the spark? Where does the crush come from? There’s chemistry–it’s not just liking someone. Friendship is everywhere, but a crush is different. There’s a mysterious combination of factors. I get excited, then hormones take over. My body trusts another person, whether it’s actually safe to trust
There’s so much I learned at the sex party. I wrote that long post about it, but I left a lot out. I want to write about queerness at the sex party because that’s one of the things that I was paying attention to and that matters the most. age I have a cliche that
“I wanted to take care of some things, so I could then socialize with my clothes off,” my spouse said. “Wow, sounds fun,” I told my spouse. “I want to socialize with my clothes off too!” We laughed. Later he did take his clothes off. I did too, and we socialized very sweetly. cuddle I
What you think about when you masturbate is a favorite topic of mine. I remember as a young person finding a copy of a book about the sex lives of women. It was a cheap paperback from the 1970s with yellowing pages. The book seemed to believe itself to be scandalous. Felt a bit sensational
The emotionally unavailable men I have been close to, and now an emotionally unavailable enby–it’s so painful, I show up for love and touch, and get clear messages that are lies. This beautiful, brilliant person signals to me that they care–they’re emotionally competent and responsible. Then I’m dropped afterward like a hot potato, treated like
A: I see we’re doing something special. B: What do you mean? I don’t want to do anything special. A: Oh, well, it looks like we are. Can we talk about that? B: Yes, let’s talk about it. I don’t know you that well, I like to do egalitarian generalized relationships, and I don’t want