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theory

kind

Nurturing from cis-men can feel so rare–we’re beaming with joy, that a cis-man did something kind. I’ve been in the situation of my head hitting a wall during sex, and advocating for myself, or someone else advocating for me.  A few times, I was not able to say “stop” to move the pillow in place. 

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unsent letter

angry

I watch my feelings change as the months pass.  I’m glad to stay in motion.  Angry this morning–yeah, I’ve been angry.  So here’s a fuck you list. fuck you  Fuck you for letting me bring you into my life, connecting with my friends and spouse and community.  For letting me welcome you, so kindly, then

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Categories
smut

feelings

“My mouth is sore from you fucking it,” I said, as we cuddled after sex.  I said it more like a purr, full of feelings. the sex He visited me in the bedroom.  I wasn’t on my phone, reading, crafting, or writing.  I was just lying there, thinking about sex.  He stood by the side

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Categories
theory

realized lately

Here are some sex and emotion facts I’ve realized lately. body My spouse and I were at a restaurant last night, and one of the bartenders looked like P.  Similar face, whiteness, mannerisms, and thin, small body. Just the resemblance alarmed me.  Different hairstyle and tattoos, but I realized that I still love P.  I

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Categories
theory

anger

I felt angry, which is ok–any feeling is ok with me, as long as I can feel it and move through it.  Anger tells me something is wrong–usually that I’m not getting what I need, or something wrong is happening, to me or another person. It really hurt me, to be dropped by someone I

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Categories
theory

apple

“So do you have a thing for E?” I asked my spouse, the apple of my eye. “Do I have a thing for E?” he asked, looking up at me. “Yeah, like do you have a crush on her?” “Yeah?” he said. “Aw!” I said.  “Like you wanna do it with her?  Like you masturbate

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Categories
theory

how I feel about erections

We were having sex.  He was standing by the bed, naked.  I was lying in the bed, mostly naked. His erection was beautiful.  I touched his round tummy, his gorgeous arms, his pretty chest.  His nipples, his balls, his dick.  It was sticking out.  I felt the softness of his balls, and the ridges of

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Categories
theory

what covid does to love

Sex is good for me, so good, to move toward pleasure and connection.  It’s healed me, taught me about trust, given me reasons to live.  Thank you to my sweet spouse for giving me so much sexual joy, these past many years.  Covid is a stressor, and I’m learning about covid love. steam valves Is

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Uncategorized

free

I don’t think your feelings for anyone are wrong.  I never feel ashamed of you.  I think you can feel however you feel about anyone in the world.  You are free, and no one can own your heart.   Maybe behavior could be more of a thing to limit, if you choose to.  But you know,

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