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bitch

This poem “bitch” is the artifact of intense longing.  Much reverence to the feelers of big feelings, truth tellers, and kinkster sexonauts.

bitch

I wanted you to turn your vehicle around, 

take me to the forest,

pin me down on the earth,

and see how many times you could make me cum.

on the dirt surrounded by trees,

I would be your bitch 

for as long as you wanted me;

I would learn your name in a new way.

how sacred is your powerful nonbinary freedom.

I wanted you to ask me 

to be your bitch immediately,

or tell me I already was.

it’s wrong, but I want it.

most of me is responsible. 

but I fantasize about you hurting me. 

I try to remember how your hands

feel on my back.

I reinhabit the moment

I yelped in pain.

we both jumped, you dropped my hand, 

you apologized, 

and you picked my hand up again.

I want you to hurt me

in a way no one has ever hurt me.

I want you to hurt me so bad

the pain floods out all other pain

I have ever experienced in my life, 

the pain that never should have happened. 

I want you to make me shake.

I want your hand on my cunt

as it throbs so red for you.

I want you to shove your fingers

in my mouth and let me suck them down

till I choke on you.

I want to choke on you.

I want you to know me as an animal.

I want you to understand my voice

when the sound vibrating out of me

is not made of language.

I want you to shove your fingers into my hole

as I come for you, 

as I bark and contract

again and again around your dexterity.

I want you to feel the hot, wet 

truth in my body.

in the world, I want to be your equal.

in bed, I want you to own me.

I want you to collar me.

I want you to own me

knowing that my spouse also owns me.

I want your hand on my neck.

I want you to fuck me until my life

is you entering me, pulling out, 

entering me.  

I want you to hit me.

I want to cum for you specifically.

I want to learn your fears

by observing your behavior.

I want you to tell me I’m your bitch

as my orgasm begins, 

and tell me I will never lack.

I want you to call me

by my true name.

I want you to kiss my fat 

and bite the soft rolls of my tummy.

I want you to touch the fat pad on my upper butt

and tell me you respect me.

I want you to grab my huge hips

and shove me down on your dick,

or whatever we call the part

you shove me down on.

I want you to love me 

with your brightest light,

and love me with your nastiest damage.

I want you to love me with 

your complete transness.

I want to kiss your labia gently.

I want to give you my heart.

I want to nurture the fuck out of you.

I want you to perceive how ripe I am.

I want to love you without controlling you.

I want to belong to you,

and I don’t want you to belong to me.

I want you to tell me you’re not mine,

and let me cry under the oak trees.

let me be made of need:

don’t rush to meet my needs

until you’re exhausted and resent me.

let me be an integrity being,

and let me suffer.

I want you to hurt me with your hands.

I want you to hurt me with the truth.

I want to tell my whole truth to you

which is located in my cunt.

I want you to lie on me as I cum.

as I thrash and lose control of my movements,

know you did that to me.

I want our sex to be life-disrupting.

I want my orgasm to finish a story 

I started telling you in the kitchen 

some months ago.

I want my orgasm to inform you.

I want to cum so hard for you

it answers any question.

I want you to choose me 

when you are not drunk.

I want you to fuck me intentionally.

I want you to know what you’re doing

by taking me.

I want you to take me hard.

I want you to accept this changes both of us.

I want you to use me for my holes.

I want you to admire me,

but never make me your trophy.

I want you to be proud I’m your bitch.

I want to belong to you all my life.

but if it’s not possible to sustain, 

I will forgive you and remember you.

I want you to know me,

the new version who’s coming into being right 

now.

By Nest

Curious, disabled Earth Goddess, telling the truth.

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