I made myself a collar, and I love it. Well, my spouse helped with the ends. We collaborate happily.
I used black parachute cord from a craft store and a metal double sided leash release. Not sure what to call those things; English fails me.
It turned out beautiful and works great for my senses, for this unique sacred body I walk around in–Nest, every day. My collar is not too tight, but meaningful. I feel it. It helps me get into a different mode.
When I take it off, for a few minutes, I miss its weight. Feels like a good sign, to want more of it.
Putting on my collar or asking my spouse to is a quick way to get aroused. Feels sacred, like the first time my spouse collared me. I asked him to hit me and tell me I belonged to him.
“Tell me: For now, you belong to me,” I requested.
“For now, you belong to me,” my spouse said.
I get off on this–my cunt aches. Part of me wants that–the power play of him owning me. It feels like a special way he wants me. Feeling wanted helps me feel safe.
I had wanted a collar so I could feel more grounded and less approachable at the sex party. There’s a sex party at a town nearby, once or twice a month, inside a huge barn. It’s a popular event and costs ten dollars to attend.
I’ve only been to one so far, but I learned a lot there and loved it as food for thought. I’ve remembered it countless times as a place with different norms and new sexual possibilities.
I’m preparing to go again. I saw collared strangers there, and I felt for the first time that wearing a collar was an option. Feels great to change as I widen what’s possible.
The party starts at 8pm, which is late–I need my sleep. So I keep an eye on when the next party is, and I hope I feel very resilient one party day. When I went before, it was winter, and the heaters in the barn gave a nasty fume. I think it will feel better at a warmer time.
The collars others wore had a circle in the middle. Mine is different, with the leash release. But I think it communicates the same ideas. What a powerful symbol. Hopefully no one will laugh at my homemade collar.