smut theory

masturbation pics

I asked my spouse to take some masturbation pics of me.  He took three.  I like this blurry one best–strange and arty.  I’m happy to share it with you.

Mistakes can be my favorite.  Praise Mother God in the form of error.

He had just fucked me, and he came inside of me.  Yum.  I thought maybe I wanted to come too, so I rubbed my vulva, especially my clit.

I was curious how all that looked.  Curiosity filled my body.  It had been a long time since we took masturbation pics.

“You look beautiful,” he said.


He loves my vulva–he loves my body in general  He’s so sweetly easy to please.  I feel zero shame with him–not for my fatness, disabilities, differences, or what my body likes.   He’s not settling for me while dreaming of someone with a more television body.  He likes all kinds of bodies, and he thinks I’m wonderful.

As I age, I still don’t feel any shame.  New wrinkles are no problem.  He likes my hair graying.  He accepts me unconditionally, as I accept him and myself.

You could say I’m lucky, but it’s hard work being this lucky.  It can be excruciating, having a partner who is disabled.  Just the poverty of that is a lot of work.  But we have to handle the actual disabilities also!

Our inter-racialness, queerness, and all the ways the world sees us as different can be a struggle.  But being loving and being loved like this is worth just about anything.

masturbation pics

Last night we were having sex in such a healing way, after difficult travel.  His dick was gorgeous and big in my hand.  Sometimes when it looks so pretty, I want to take masturbation pics of him also.

He’s definitely good with that  But dick pics are nothing I would post on my blog–that kind of explict is not my jam.  Afflicting people with pictures of my breasts seems fine, but genitals are a whole other matter.

queer diy

Do you think masturbation is beautiful?  Do you love someone the way my spouse loves me?  Have you ever been loved so kindly and safely?

Is your sexual desire ecumenical, idiosyncratic, fetish specific, broad, narrow, or what culture taught you to like in a commercial when you were eight years old?

I like having a queer diy sexuality.  I don’t see movies or tv, partly so I can push outside of me as much as I can others’ tastes in bodies.  I’d rather choose as much as I can for myself.  Feels good to get as deep into my own truth as possible, into what really matters to me, not what I was told to value.

By Nest

Curious, disabled Earth Goddess, telling the truth.

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