breast convention

“That would be conventional,” I said, and moved his hand to my breast.  We were cuddling nakedly in bed, and he was sleepy.  We were having a conversation that was inconsequential.

“Wow, wouldn’t that be great.  Would you like to go to a breast convention?  I bet you’d like that.”

“Yeah!” he said.

“Mmm, I would love to go to a breast convention!”  I like breasts more than just about anything.

variety

“Wow, we could see all kinds of breasts.  Nipples that are inverted–nipples that poke out.  Small ones, huge ones.  Breasts that are not matching that much, or breasts missing.  Extra nipples–extra breasts.  Yeah!  Sounds amazing!”

He was sleepy but listening, nuzzling my breasts as we cuddled.  I held him and kissed his head.

“We could learn all about breasts!  Breast health, breast functions.  We could go to workshops.  What if we went to a workshop on breast orgasms?  That would be so cool!  What if someone had a breast orgasm in the workshop?  That would be amazing!”  I imagined a lady on the stage, having her breasts stimulated, and coming for all of us to see.

I was happy to imagine all this.  “Maybe you could get Continuing Education Units,” I suggested.  “What do you think?”

“Yeah!” he said.

“Hmm, what is this fantasy turning into?” I asked, thinking more about the breast orgasm workshop.  How were we supposed to react, to the lady coming?  “What are the parameters of this fantasy?  I don’t know the rules.”  Seemed about health then was shifting into a sexy fantasy.

learning is fun

Cultural views of breasts throughout history in many lands.  Breasts of goddesses.  Laws for Bodily Restriction: How Breasts Are Legislated in the United States.  Tons about breastfeeding.  A workshop on bras, including bra design, materials, a virtual tour of a bra factory.  Trans breast experiences.  Laughing About Love: Jokes About Breasts As Intimate Need.

Oh yeah.  I want a Master’s degree in breasts.  Maybe I should write a book about my own!  Something about my breast journey, seeing my whole life through breasts.  Girlfriends, my own experiences growing them, now that they loosen with middle age, tons of breast art!

Breasts are a valid topic.  The world tries to tell me it’s petty, but it’s not.  Breasts are important truth worth learning about and speaking about.