“Do I have a spider on me?” he asked.
“No–I don’t think so!” I said. “Come over here. Let me do a spider inspection.”
He came to me, beautiful. I looked him over. “What kind of spider might I be looking for?” I asked.
“Big like a Daddy Longlegs.”
“Turn around,” I said. I looked all over him “Let me look in your hair.” I lifted up his gorgeous, long hair and looked through it all. “Nope, definitely, no spider.”
He lift his shirt. “How about here?” he asked.
I poked a finger in his belly button. “Nope,” I said. “No way there’s a spider on you. It would have to be in your pocket, in which case it would be smooshed, and not a problem, that way.”
We were smiling at one another. “You could take off your clothes, if you would like me to look more carefully. Tick inspection?”
He laughed. His hand went to his dick, like he had an erection that was hurting him and needed to be adjusted.
“Tick inspection! Not dick inspection!” I said. “Well, we could do dick inspection…”
We had sex twice yesterday. Once in the morning, and once in the afternoon.
All he has to do is come to bed naked. So pretty. His gorgeous, brown body is my home. I’m safe there, in an excited way. I glimpse his large, strong ass, and I’m ready for anything.
The morning sex, I sucked his dick. My neck’s been extra sore, so I was a little worried. But it feels good, today. He fucked my mouth. It was similar to the other day, when I gagged a little bit, wanted to dissociate, but recovered and stayed in my body.
The second time, he was sleepy. He was lying on the bed, and I asked if I could put coconut oil on my hands and rub his dick for a long time. Yes, he wanted that.
“It’s ok if you fall asleep,” I said. “Part of you will be awake!”
I rubbed his dick for a long time, with the slippery coconut oil. I kissed the head of his dick, his thighs, his balls. Felt good to lick the head of his dick, sometimes.
Then I blew him. He was happy to receive my attention. He fell asleep, and I came neither time.
“I’m hungry–I need a snack,” he said last night.
“You already gave me snacks today,” I said. “Two snacks–one big, one little.” We smiled.
Yes, swallowing his come is my norm–what an intimate snack. He is my darling. I’m lucky to have this love which is so tender and caring.
I love how the sex is a strong theme in our whole relationship. We had an argument, and he hugged me while apologizing. He held me, and our faces were close. The hug feeling with kisses evoked the thousands of times we’ve had sex. The different safe feelings go together.
I can come to him with my needs–he can come to me with his. The sex isn’t separate. We talk about what we need honestly.
That feels like–what is a happy relationship. The parts of it are all mixed together. Sex can be another world we go into, but it’s also a thread woven through everything. One way of many that we care for one another, heal rifts, pay attention to one another, give love, experience pleasure, make meaning.
Grateful he came to me, to ask about a spider, with fear. I could comfort him with words and with my body.